anger...and peace
I went to a discussion on anger and peace a couple of nights ago. There was a lot of talk about anger - what it actually; is it beneficial; how we use it; what it means to different people; how to handle other people's anger; do peaceful people feel anger; etc..
I realised that I very rarely feel anger these days. Oh yes, I have in the past...I would get frustrated rather easily, but not say anything until it had built upon itself to the point that it needed to be released. I was torn between the power I knew I had inside of me and the rules and conditionings I was raised to follow. I rebelled and struggled and tried not to hurt others. Denying myself only prolonged my own hurt until I found the courage to reclaim my power and heal.
I was attracted to go to the discussion because they were to be talking about Peace...and I just love that topic! The majority of the evening was on anger and I started wondering why I was there. I don't know if I said anything during the evening that may have helped someone, but it probably helped with my connection to that community, just by contributing. On the way home, I realised that I have come so far on my journey. I chose a path of Peace, and even if I wasn't always peaceful, I was working towards that goal. Talking about anger gave me a greater appreciation for the Peace in my life and made me feel lighter.
When people spoke about their anger, they spoke also of a physical expression of that - hitting a wall, kicking an object etc. Have you ever been really angry and not been able to physically release that? Can you sit still in a chair and say "I'm really angry?". Probably not...you need to move and raise your arms and stride around and, because you are feeling hurt, you also feel like releasing that in a way that may reflect hurt, whether it's hitting a pillow or a wall or kicking something. It just doesn't seem to release it as well if you start doing jumping jacks or some such activity.
As physical movement helps to release anger, what if could also work on preventing those anger spikes by taking steps every day to avoid getting to that level? A lot of people just do not get enough physical activity. We sit at computers for hours, we stroll around a shopping center, we press some buttons on the washing machine. Then we go for a 20 minute walk and think we've gotten our exercise for the day. We need movement to release all of the little frustrations that our daily lives bring. Plus, movement releases endorphins which help us just to feel good.
What else can help us prevent anger, and even reduce frustration? It has to start by taking care of your physical body...movement, eating foods that give you energy, getting enough sleep. And you also have to consider your mind - speaking your truth, stating in a calm, assertive manner how you feel especially if you feel someone has said or done something that has bothered you. It takes courage and confidence to do this. When I started working out at the gym, I noticed that as my physical body got stronger, my mind did too and confidence came with that and helped me to stand my own ground and pursue my own goals.
Having a spiritual practice helps also. Meditation is wonderful for quietening the mind and getting in touch with the deeper part of Who You Really Are. Once you know that, or have even touched on that a little bit, your personal light shines brighter and other people can sense that. When you show respect and kindness for yourself, by taking care of yourself physically, mentally and spiritually, you project that out and will find more people treating you in a more respectful and kind way. Your ability to deal with little frustrations increases and the incidence of anger in your self greatly decreases. It doesn't mean anger will stop all together right away, but it will decrease over time. It's a beautiful thing. It just starts with a decision to live a peaceful path.
I realised that I very rarely feel anger these days. Oh yes, I have in the past...I would get frustrated rather easily, but not say anything until it had built upon itself to the point that it needed to be released. I was torn between the power I knew I had inside of me and the rules and conditionings I was raised to follow. I rebelled and struggled and tried not to hurt others. Denying myself only prolonged my own hurt until I found the courage to reclaim my power and heal.
I was attracted to go to the discussion because they were to be talking about Peace...and I just love that topic! The majority of the evening was on anger and I started wondering why I was there. I don't know if I said anything during the evening that may have helped someone, but it probably helped with my connection to that community, just by contributing. On the way home, I realised that I have come so far on my journey. I chose a path of Peace, and even if I wasn't always peaceful, I was working towards that goal. Talking about anger gave me a greater appreciation for the Peace in my life and made me feel lighter.
When people spoke about their anger, they spoke also of a physical expression of that - hitting a wall, kicking an object etc. Have you ever been really angry and not been able to physically release that? Can you sit still in a chair and say "I'm really angry?". Probably not...you need to move and raise your arms and stride around and, because you are feeling hurt, you also feel like releasing that in a way that may reflect hurt, whether it's hitting a pillow or a wall or kicking something. It just doesn't seem to release it as well if you start doing jumping jacks or some such activity.
As physical movement helps to release anger, what if could also work on preventing those anger spikes by taking steps every day to avoid getting to that level? A lot of people just do not get enough physical activity. We sit at computers for hours, we stroll around a shopping center, we press some buttons on the washing machine. Then we go for a 20 minute walk and think we've gotten our exercise for the day. We need movement to release all of the little frustrations that our daily lives bring. Plus, movement releases endorphins which help us just to feel good.
What else can help us prevent anger, and even reduce frustration? It has to start by taking care of your physical body...movement, eating foods that give you energy, getting enough sleep. And you also have to consider your mind - speaking your truth, stating in a calm, assertive manner how you feel especially if you feel someone has said or done something that has bothered you. It takes courage and confidence to do this. When I started working out at the gym, I noticed that as my physical body got stronger, my mind did too and confidence came with that and helped me to stand my own ground and pursue my own goals.
Having a spiritual practice helps also. Meditation is wonderful for quietening the mind and getting in touch with the deeper part of Who You Really Are. Once you know that, or have even touched on that a little bit, your personal light shines brighter and other people can sense that. When you show respect and kindness for yourself, by taking care of yourself physically, mentally and spiritually, you project that out and will find more people treating you in a more respectful and kind way. Your ability to deal with little frustrations increases and the incidence of anger in your self greatly decreases. It doesn't mean anger will stop all together right away, but it will decrease over time. It's a beautiful thing. It just starts with a decision to live a peaceful path.
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